When the coronavirus struck a few things occurred to me as I realized this was going to be something that effected society and the way we live. I jotted these notes down as a series of Instagram stories. Naturally, they swing between the profound and the absurd. Granted, other people have said some similar things but at the time they were unique to me.
In a few years there will be a punk band named ‘Social Distancing’
Many companies will realize they can go fully remote and will so after the panic is over
Elbow tapping replaces handshakes as the social norm. 20 years later they become a nostalgic gesture the people will do half jokingly
In nine months there will be a baby boom. These will be ‘Coviebabies’
This summer when things calm down, every venue that has an outdoor space will be packed with people
Everyone who ever made a doomsday prophecy now thinks they are right
In 25 years a member of Britain’s royal family will dress as the coronavirus as a Halloween costume and it will cause outrage in the tabloids
Sexual harassment cases will drop off significantly but HR will now have to deal with virtual harassment cases
The person who restocks the toilet paper at the grocery store will now be included in the term ‘first responders’
Soon ‘at-home’ haircuts will be trending on social media
When we can all go out again there will be a line outside every dry cleaner and laundromat
Environmentalists and Climate Change Deniers will both use the pollution reduction to bolster their arguments
In a similar way, The NRA will appropriate the data showing mass shootings going down during this time
In 1 year 50% of conversations will start with “During Covid…" The other 50% will start with “After Covid…”
Bidet sales in the US will increase
After the success of ‘Tiger King’ every documentary maker with a film in the can will want to premiere on a streaming service while we’re on lockdown